about to speak?

seriously, i don't even know what i am going to write.

the first thing that comes up to my mind is, "I pass high school"
wait, i (do really) want pass high school because there is a lot of condition that i need to explain. but when i am in the finish line of being a high school student, my mom told me this,

"coba nonton ****, di film itu kelihatannya SMA tuh indah banget kan, tapi ternyata, biasa aja. ga seindah kaya di film"

yea, she's really my reflection.

but seriously, gue baru nonton film itu ketika mau deket-deket UN kemarin. hahaha. time flies.

seriously, time flies really faaast sampe-sampe gue baru tau kalo dia sudah punya yang baru dan tidak bersama yang lama itu. #UPS #beda topik

anggep aja yang tadi tuh gak ada. hahaha. so here's the focuse one.

pernah gak, you have a lot of words at your mind but you're stuck when you're about to speak?

tbh, I'm the one of the banyaknya orang di dunia yang kaya gitu.

i never get the feeling when i am about to top of the mountain even if i know when i'm at the top of mountain.

yaudah, gue cerita aja. i don't know, maybe gue bakalan punya 3 cerita sekaligus yang bakalan gue ulas disini, ups. kebanyakan ya? gak kok, pendek2.

jadi, ada cowo. he has a blog and he is more "blue" than me. postingannya selalu menyedihkan. postingannya selalu berbau black and white. honestly i dont know him either, but you know what? he's more pathetic than me if you are see his blog. cowo itu sangat open-minded. dan setiap tulisan yang dia published, he always show off a side of his own. even if gue gak tau maksudnya dia apa, nulis yang ujung-ujungnya cerita ttg diri sendiri. nangis di media. curhat ke media, even if ada yang baca, it doesn't make any sense. #guegakngaca. i've watched his blog around 4-5 months. but he's really open-minded. guess what? he writes what i am afraid to write. he such an amazing guy. dia berani tulis apa yang dia mau tulis. he has that courage (and i am fucking not) in his soul.
then what? terakhir kali gue lihat blog-nya, ada yang berbeda.
bukan beda lagi, beneran "bukan dia yang gue tau selama ini"
tebak?
ya deh gue kasih tau.
he changed the blog. blog nya berwarna parah. berwarna dalam arti bukan yang blog2 rame gitu. dia gak pake black and white lagi. and he post a pict of him and he was really happy. then i guess,
he has a girlfriend. and you know what? tulisannya makin bagus.

i think, everybody needs that people.
nah, not everybody, maybe i am the one who really needs that people to come into my life, right now.


second,
ada cewe and honesly she's into a guy that never likes her. terus, ada deh cewe juga yang udah lama suka sama tuh cowo. saingan dong? nah si cewe ini gak menganggap saingan because she told me like,

ngapain berebutan cowo. there's a lot of plenty fish at the sea. and i'm too old enough buat berebutan cowo. 

sheeeeee's so wisely when she told me like that and i am 100% agreed with her. dan akhirnya, gada yang pacaran sama tuh cowo. but what? cewe yang udah lama suka ama tuh cowo menganggep kalo "wah, dia saingan gue", "gue harus di atas nya dia"

i tell you, i really hate that people. apaansih lo, cuma cowo doang ampe gamau ngalah. lu kira dia bakalan ngelamar, lu kira bakalan nikah? katanya mau sukses, tapi ngeliat ada cewe lain yang suka sama tuh cowo malah "gue harus di atas tuh cewe". duh, people these days.

untuk cerita yang kedua, tolong jangan dipraktikkan. karena itu really really bad behaviour. dan gue gak mau di dunia ini makin banyak orang yang spesies nya kaya gitu. dihhh. really annoys me the most.


so the last.
my friend call me and she justs ask,

what if you really want to write about this guy, but you certainly didn't because you have no courage?


#np Demi Lovato - Skyscraper
-Mutia Novianti-